My Internal Writing Conflict

[rusty_patriot]

I don’t know if this is the right place to post something like this, but I’m not sure where else to post this, and this just seemed like, I guess a good place. Someone with actual experience might know what to do, or something.

Basically, I don’t know what to do about my writing because I have all these story ideas that I want to turn into actual written stories, but I just hate the writing process, and it makes me think I should just quit before I even really start because, I mean how can I write a story if I don’t write at all.

I don’t like the actual writing process. Like, I love storytelling. I don’t know why I like it, I just feel really passionate about other stories people tell, and being able to tell my own story, but I guess I’m not passionate enough to actually write anything.

It just feels conflicting, and my self doubt doesn’t help. I want to tell my stories but I don’t want to write. And then I don’t know what I’d do with my ideas if I were to give up on trying writing at all. I’ve spent too much time with some of them, developing plots and characters, I can’t just throw them away.

I don’t know. I’m sorry if I’m being stupid or dumb at all with this.

[James_L_Steele]

Writing is an arduous process, and it takes years of practice to even become proficient at it. Disciplining yourself to sit down and compose takes years of effort. Refining what you compose into something other people can comprehend is another discipline by itself. Some people are more inclined to conquering those parts than others. And I don’t think the self-doubt ever really goes away.

If you haven’t been doing it for long, I’d suggest gritting your teeth and pushing past this part. On the other side, you may just find satisfaction. Yes, it sounds like you’ve been writing for a while but haven’t gotten to the part where you’re satisfied with what you’ve done. That part does come eventually, but you may have to endure several failed attempts before you reach it.

If you’ve been doing it for years and it’s still no easier or less unpleasant, I’d question if writing is your calling. There are other forms of storytelling you can pursue if you’re passionate about telling your own. Maybe storytelling isn’t your callin,g but some other form of creative calling is. It’s up to you to decide if this is something you must push through, or if it’s a sign you’re not suited for it.

[Lewkz84]

Just write what you feel originally, then polish the finer details until the text flows and is alive.

[Frank_LeRenard]

It sounds like an interesting conundrum. My initial thoughts on reading your post more or less echo what James L. Steele said, because in my own experience I have to push myself past a hump nearly every time I sit down to write. Once I get over the hump it becomes enjoyable. Kind of like physical exercise.

That hump for me can be technical — how do I phrase this thought, why do my paragraphs all sound the same, how do I keep this scene from becoming just constant ‘he said she said’ — or I’ll get some grand idea but then get stuck realizing I need to put down the specifics in order to get there, which I haven’t thought about at all yet — do I describe him walking to the car, do I say what the scenery looks like, should he meet anyone on the way, etc. I can see such things, when thought about all at once, quickly becoming paralyzing. Sometimes they are for me.

I don’t know if you’re in that boat or not, but I find it helps to separate those things from the storytelling itself as its own art, to be tended to with a completely different mindset. Playing with language, using words in unusual and creative ways. Jerking the plot threads around, throwing in unexpected events. Whatever you like that somehow makes the actual laborious writing part as fun as the creative part. There’s a certain joy in just getting weird on the road to telling your tale, and honestly, the end product tends to be better for it (at least in my opinion).

Anyway, if you relate at all to that maybe you’ll find inspiration in it that will help solve your problem. Otherwise I guess I failed to understand exactly what the problem is.

[Huskyteer]

I hate sitting down to write and distract myself like crazy. And sometimes I hate writing and every word’s a struggle. What makes it worthwhile for me is getting in the zone where it all flows, and I start getting ideas out of nowhere. Finishing a story is also a wonderful reward.